A Wistful Letter

Goodbye, South Korea. You were kind of good to me.

There's too much going on inside you, and when crowds gather, everyone pushes everyone. I'm too short and impatient for that. Being outside of your structure has its benefits and drawbacks. While we are easily forgiven for any social faux pas that we commit, we are also not considered real people. Sometimes, when some people realize we don't speak Korean, we are simply dismissed with a hand wave. The older citizens of this country tend to be very pushy - and while most are well meaning, there are those who are downright condescending - like anywhere else, I suppose. I never enjoyed bowing. I could have, but didn't care about your fashion standards. My luck with jobs in you was also not great; I know some other people had a much better time than I did.

However.

You gave me an honest living for twenty months, and I met many friends here. I had many adventures that I will hold dear to my heart for many decades. Your kids taught me more words in your language than your adults did. I would still enjoy teaching. Isolated from American politics and the Western way of thinking for a while, I realized the effects upon me from where I grew up, who my parents are, and the small actions that I took. Both apartments that you provided me with were very easy to live in, and I felt at home. You gave me a cat. I experienced both rural Korean life and small city Korean culture. Your food was great. Your citizens are unexpectedly helpful at the most surprising moments. Your country is safe. You taught me that in struggles between individual and society, sometimes it's not so bad when society wins.

You taught me to live alone. You taught me to begin to pursue what I want, or even to begin to think about exactly what it is that I want.

Thank you.

These were all the thoughts running through my head as I repacked my luggage in front of the check-in counter to adhere to the "only one" rule, and then went to the ticketing counter to pay an extra $75 for the second luggage. These are the feelings falling from my steps as I went through security, then when the personnel at immigration took my Korean identity card away from me.

If I could hug a whole country and donate my tears, I would. There are surely things that I haven't done and seen yet, and someday, I will come back and pursue them.

For all my friends I met here, you better stay in contact - I am getting a smart phone and downloading Kakao Talk for sure!

First Time in Tokyo

It's only been 3 days, but it feels like longer in a very good way. The flight from Incheon to Narita Airport in Tokyo only took 2 hrs, and I stayed awake the whole time. Despite misgivings, baggage claim and navigation to the hostel went without much of a hitch. I had a moment of doubt when transferring from the express airport railway to the local train to get to the hostel's stop, but an older lady helped me out, and I just took a taxi from the subway, because it was already dark.

I had expected to just chill the first night, but as I was settling down to be on the computer, I met a bunch of college students who are going to play Tekken on the common room tv. Conversations started, introductions went on, and I met people, just like that. One of them led me to Senso-ji, the local Buddhist temple. It was very nice. Then when we came back from our evening walk, I somehow got challenged to a game of Magic the Gathering. It was mainly due to my teammate's hard work, but we won.

Second day. The same friend who led me around the Senso-ji temple leads me there again so I can buy some gifts for family. Then, we explored a bit and went inside the Amuse Museum. It's a small display of Japanese paintings, some old weaving machines, hemp cloth, and a milieu of objects. Then we went to Akihabara. We hit up some collectors' shops, arcades, and then just because I requested it, a porn shop. We stopped at a maid cafe, then there was a doll shop.

Third day. I picked a direction and wandered in a direction that led me to a bridge over a river. It was very pretty. Then there was a small park. I bought a subway pass and took myself to Shinjuku. The skyline was very impressive, and there were many slot machine parlors. I got myself a feather tattoo. I took myself then to Harajaku, which reminded me a little bit of Harvard Square. A friend from the hostel wanted to go for a walk that evening, so we did. We got a bit lost, but I got us unlost.

Fourth day. I got off at Yoracho Station. There seems to be financial buildings all around. I found the Hibiya Garden, but didn't go in because there was rain. Instead, I went to the Inpensu (?) Museum which had a lot of ceramics and wall dividers which had a lot of very detailed paintings on them. There were masks and statues too, but I wasn't allowed to take pictures. Then I took a walk around the Imperial Palace, but didn't actually go to the touristy stuff inside. Then I walked for a long time, and ate noodles inside Otemachi Station, and took myself to Ikkeburo. There was a whole street of old fashioned food, lots of new art galleries and whatnot in the new portion, but also lots of adult entertainment in the older portion of town. I took another hour or two in Akihabara on my way back, and when I came to the hostel, I joined two women for drinks and snacks and we talked a lot about our future plans.

Starting Last Calls

As mentioned briefly in the last post, I no longer have a job. This means that once again, it's decision making time. I am electing to go home to the United States to bet on a job there... But not before taking advantage of being on this side of the globe to plan a trip and check some other to-do's off the bucket list. Not that I actually have a bucket list.

How did I lose my job? Nothing extraordinary. A couple of kids quit the academy - kids quit all the time - so that's what the vice owner and owner told the head teacher, to save face. What is actually happening is that the academy is rapidly losing money, because the youngest kids' school days got extended to make up for the new lack of school on Saturdays. Many of these academies are not managed all that well, so when it's time to cut corners, the foreigners come first, and I hit the jackpot. The only other foreigner at that academy is a Canadian man married to a Korean woman, so he is bound to be staying for a long time.

So what are the first things that I did after getting laid off? I modeled for a photoshoot (this isn't new, I've been modeling for about several months now) and ran a 10k. It was a swimsuit shoot near Osan, my first swimsuit shoot. Then I would have a Chinese cheongsam shoot at Seoul Grand Park, and a spontaneous shoot at Woo Am.

Modeling is something I picked up in Korea, though I had thought about it before coming here. I wasn't interested in it before, but the emphasis on fashion is real and everywhere here, so I eventually decided to learn. It involves listening to the photographer's ideas about what he wants to shoot, then picking my outfits and makeup carefully. If I don't have some items, it's time to go shopping, but I tried to buy versatile products so I wouldn't have to spend so much money. Even though all photographers are different, all logistics are agreed upon before a shoot: paid or unpaid, date and time, and location.

From this, I learned to put together different types of outfits and how to better apply makeup. However, on a daily basis, I still prefer to be bare faced with tshirt and jeans or shorts.

The next day, my friends and I ran a 10k. One woman ran a 21k. Some others went for the 5k. In high school, I had run cross country for a short period of time. I was no good at it. Even so, I still got hooked onto the idea of making my body stronger and the feeling of adrenaline.

Because of these same urges, yesterday two friends and I went paragliding. This means going to a place where there are mountains, wearing air suits over our own clothes, becoming attached to a parachute (and my paid guide) to run off the mountain and be carried around in the air for about fifteen to twenty minutes.

Aside from the Cheongju trip, I had never really planned anything before, so the build up to the actual paragliding itself was a lot of getting organized. My friends asked just the right questions for me to go do my research. I stayed at my friend's house the night before, and we woke up at 5:15 to catch the 6:43 KTX to Seoul Station, taking the Metro from there to Hoegi and transferring to the Junggang line, and then getting off at Asin Station. There, I called my contact JJ and he assigned someone to pick us up.

The man arrived in a black Mustang convertible, which played Lady Gaga as we drove past their offices and then to the landing site. There, we paid the organization's leader 100,000won each since I deposited 60k for myself and one friend while the other deposited the money herself. Then we went to their offices for a short rest while they took pictures of a man who had finished the whole paragliding training course and gave him a certificate. Then we all piled onto a pickup truck and rode to the top of the mountain, where the takeoff pads are.

Our ears were popping on the way. We made conversation, and the ride itself took about maybe half an hour. When we got to the top, they took out all the gear, and strapped us into the suits, the padding behind, the plastic knee and shin pads, the helmet and the gloves. We each got paired off with a guide, and then waited. They decided to move to a different mountain top, because the wind wasn't picking up where we were. So we did that, then my guide, Mr. Yeong, strapped himself to the parachute, then himself to me, and told me to run. I felt like a harness dog from Call of the Wild for a few minutes.

Then we lifted off! It was amazing. I know pollution is pretty bad worldwide, but you wouldn't know it from looking at all the trees over there 700m below, and feel how much oxygen there is while floating in the sky. My guide took photos and a video, which I will send to my friends when I get them through email. Then he pointed out landmarks in his accented English, and sent us spinning like it's a roller coaster ride. I got a tiny bit nauseous, but was okay for the most part. The view was still beautiful, and in a few minutes, we landed.

The ride back was mostly sleeping. When I got home, I planned some more, and then fell asleep. Right now I'm in Incheon, ready for lunch, and tomorrow will get on a flight to Tokyo, Japan.

Korea Somewhat Interrupted

Hi, guys. I am UNBELIEVABLY tired, because it's been a very hectic day despite my no longer having a job. Let's go over what happened, also because I am a bit too rattled to go to sleep at the moment.

This morning, a friend took me to Choongdae, the local university, so that we could book our individual flights. I had a samgeokkimbap for breakfast. I booked my flight to Japan for a very good price of around $350. Then he and I went to get omerice for brunch.

Then, I went back to the animal hospital to get the rabies certification for my cat Eugene. Even though I wanted to take him on the flight with me, there are two layovers for the cheapest flight, so I don't want him to suffer much. I buckled and emailed the Pet Airlines guy to pick him up on the 27th. While I am in Japan, my yoga teacher will be taking care of him for a week.

After that, I decided to ship a suitcase at the post office, but of course, found out once again that they won't ship suitcases (especially not by sea) if it's over 20kg. So I ended up having to take everything out of my suitcase and put it into 2 boxes they supplied, and the sum came to about $73.

Being very pleased with having booked the flight for Japan, I booked the hostel too, all 7 nights, and wrote down the directions from the airport to the hostel. As I was trying to book my flight home to Boston, I got distracted because there's a woman who wants to take some of the furniture off my hands.

So I attempt to go meet her at 5, but then her schedule intervened, and I wandered around Shinae instead, putting together this Greek/classical outfit for no reason other than vanity. It all cost about $130. But first, I had a blueberry cream cheese waffle and Earl Gray tea for lunch. Then I went home for a while and was facebooking. Then I went to go meet the woman who wants furniture. I remember thinking, I spent a lot of time at Choongdae's front gate today, while drinking a small size aloe juice.

She came by, she's very friendly and talkative. We went back to my apartment, and she wanted all the things she said she would, so I helped her take the bookshelf, bookcase and water kettle to her apartment. We had to dismantle the bookshelf a bit first. I also gave her quick dried food I knew I wasn't going to finish. And a 3-meter ethernet wire. We got to talking, and she's also from Boston. I miss Boston. We got a cab back to her place, which is very far on the other side of town. She gave me $10 for the taxi home, and I was grateful.

Then I went outside and took the bus. But the bus was the last bus and stopped only at the bus rest stop where they all go at the end of the night. I got off, but I had no idea where I was. I remember the lady talking about it, and I am very much at the east end of town. I walked for about 15-20 min. before I could find a taxi. I was so relieved when I did, because I was getting hungry again. Most of the food I had had all day were snacks. I bumped into the head teacher who helped fire me when I got home, and I told him life is awesome without TOPIA.

When I got home, one of my photographers asked me to register with Forever 21 the Korean site, so I did that fumblingly, while trying to finish booking my flight home. In the few hours I was gone, the price had gone up $200! @.@ So then I finished booking my flight home - because it was still cheaper than the other prices, even the price at Choongdae. Then I registered for a familiar clothing store - in a foreign language.

After that, I realized there were huge holes in my plans to paraglide with my friends on the 16th, so I called the company again to fix those holes, and now there is much more information. But I still faltered and kind of freaked out in front of my friends. I emailed my mother and sister about the cat. I plotted out the rest of my schedule with my Australian Korean BFF, and we're going to some herb gardens tomorrow, with something as yet unknown for Wednesday. Because I'm meeting her tomorrow about 9ish around her apartment, I should go to sleep now.

It will be a deep sleep. Zzzzz....

The Bell Tolls - Korea, Round Two, Fight!

Driving to Cheongju took 4 hrs, mainly because there was some traffic due to an accident along the way. The former coteacher put on a Korean American radio station, which narrated in English but mixed in some old Korean songs. When reception ran out, he put on a tape about how foreigners view Koreans that was still sympathetic to the Koreans. I feel like there should be more literature telling the natives here how to deal with foreigner presence, because people have run away from me because I was speaking English before.

The Cheongju Express Bus Terminal was next to a building called Dream Plus, and it was tiny. The waiting area only had roughly 8 benches. I sat down to surf around on the netbook using Samsung wi-fi while waiting for my recruiter John Yoon, mentioned before here. I spoke to an old American tourist couple in the meantime about the crafts fair that happens here every year the last two weeks of September. Mr. Yoon arrived maybe an hour and a half later - I was really early despite the traffic - and he called my employer after greetings.

The owner of the private academy turned out to be a short skinny and well intentioned man, Mr. Min. We went straight to TOPIA, where he and Mr. Yoon talked for a bit, and I was introduced to my two handlers, Alex and Yvonne. They're both nice and very businesslike women. Yvonne is more outgoing than Alex, and I assume more high ranking as well. When I start teaching, I'm going to spend a few hours on that website everyday, entering homework assignments, readings and student grades.

Afterwards, they showed me my apartment - which was happily less than ten minutes walking away from my work place, and only a few minutes walking to two bus stops as well. It had security, was convenient, definitely big enough... but had absolutely no furniture save the bed. I need to walk around and familiarize myself with the area anyway, but this forces me to go out since I need furniture to put clothes in. Yvonne and Mr. Min did say that they'd provide me with a desk, which they followed up on about a week later, and they bought me a chair to go with it, as well as an end table and a mirror, as well. Anyway, that day they told me to rest, and that two hours later, I should eat dinner with Yvonne and Mr. Min.

As was practical, I spent the two hours setting up my bed, letting my cat roam the apartment, and putting all my necessaries in the bathroom. Then I went to eat dinner with my superiors. Mr. Min is a nice guy who has some grasp of English, but mainly relies on Yvonne to do his speaking for him. She is a powerful woman - short, skinny, pretty and very charismatic. It's hard not to like her, and it's people like her that make you want to work for a company, even if it's a corporate franchise - and every corporation in the U.S. and Korea practically comes with a warning label.

After dinner, she wants to see how I'm living, so we talked for a bit more in my apartment. She seemed satisfied and left, but two hours later I discovered that the gas had not been turned on, and I'd be too cold to take a shower. When I called her about it, she came to investigate immediately - if you're working for someone who works that hard herself, how could I bear to disappoint? She called the gas company, and they said that this apartment doesn't have an account currently, so they'll fix it the next day. She was irritated at it, and I said that was fine, except that I felt really dirty. She was nice enough to let me stay at a hotel for the night and shower there, though I hadn't unpacked anything so I still couldn't arrive in nice clothes the next day.

After the first day of observation, they asked me how it was and I gave them my initial impressions. They seemed happy to know that I'm somewhat comfortable with it. They also told me to dress more formally, which in my head translated to "Try harder." I guess it was reasonable, since I was in a long sleeved plain tee without makeup and had on trainers (long exercise pants). The next day, I wore a short dress with black tights with a long pendant necklace as per Korean fashion, and also put in my contact lenses. The way people viewed and treated me differently was very immediate. I was no longer invisible; it was like I materialized out of thin air.

I got to know my coworkers' names not only from introductions, but also from having to observe their classes. I noted the differences in each of their teaching styles, as well as the actions they all have in common, which I took to be habits that I should cultivate. I preferred the more businesslike demeanor of two of the female teachers who still bantered with the students and have great senses of humors. There are also more women at this private academy than men, and the two new hires are also Korean American women. I wonder if they thought I was Korean American. (I'm going to wager that I was chosen based on my recruiter's advertising, my previous one-year experience, and looks, though.)

Each teacher carried around a case of chalk, a board eraser, an audio wire, flash cards if they use them, extra pens and highlighters, and maybe a notebook for remembering things. They used their laptops when the book comes with a cd track that they might use, and also make marks in the attendance record for that class, as well as the homework record. Textbooks are par for the course in an academy, because the curriculum, timeline and syllabus are already all set. There are cameras in every classroom, which are live fed to the tv in front of the receptionist desk for all to see. The staff has a more cajoling American manner in terms of educating the kids, and everything is somewhat tightly controlled - but not unreasonably, so far as I can see.

They took me to immigration on Thursday, where I had pictures taken - I was wearing a new shirt, yay! - and they wrote my new address on the back of my Alien Registration Card. Apparently, that's all that's necessary to consider my E-2 visa renewed for now, though they did say that I should submit my national criminal background check whenever I can, since I told them that it was in progress and the U.S. FBI should be processing it now. I honestly actually don't even know when I should be expecting it. I applied in August, so November or December, maybe? Anyway, now I can do useful things like get a phone plan. I've been surviving off of using prepaid phone cards.

Aside from visiting Daejeon this past weekend, I also bought and installed a small bookcase - which became a shirts dresser for me - and a clothing rack. I'm finished with unpacking half of the spare bags and two of my suitcases - two more await. I still need more furniture because there must needs to be a place to store my pants, which I will take care of ASAP. I will also teach my first classes tomorrow (to substitute for a guy who is filling in a cavity and getting his wisdom teeth pulled), and I think I'm ready too, so wish me luck. =)

South Korean Fashion

This time, I distinguished between North and South Korea because I haven't had a chance to visit North Korea, and also I hear that the Kim Jong Il personality cult doesn't allow for much freedom of expression, so I assume this would be true in terms of fashion, as well. The two countries are getting farther apart culturally the longer they remain separated, so despite all attempts at conversation, they will now have to deal with a new invisible barrier between them.

Nevertheless, Seoul is one of the fashion capitals of the world, not far after Paris and New York City. Of course, the leaders of the fashion industry are the pop stars and actors who dominate the small screen, and sometimes even the big screen. My personal favorites among them are 4minute, 2PM, Big Bang, Girls' Generation, and Taeyang. While there are individual artists, they generally start out performing with other people until their names are better known. G-Dragon and Hyuna are two good examples.

Starting with the hair, almost everyone here has bangs. They just don't like to show their foreheads and like to try to emphasize their eyes. With the face, large eyes with the crease in the eyelids are favored, paired with a small to medium sized nose, and everyone loves a pair of luscious lips. Skin wise, Koreans like their complexions very pale, so they avoid the sun unless they are farmers, fishermen, or other types of laborers. Like with other countries, this is more of a class issue. However, Korean women have a kind of cream that they put on their faces, with other makeup, daily to make sure their skin is light enough to be fashionable. They aim for a healthy looking complexion that ideally glows.

In terms of body types, most Koreans are very skinny, especially compared to Americans. Women are generally just skinny unless they were born with a bigger body type, which they would be continuously ridiculed for throughout their childhoods. Men have skinny, slim - which really muscular - or business, which is kind of a Buddha body type lite. Unless they are athletes or labor workers, no one generally exercises. They drive wherever they go, there are taxis around, and when they're not working twelve hours a day or having fun singing, drinking or at some event, they just kind of sit. There's the television and lots of video games to occupy them. Video games seem to be an activity that people of all ages partake in here.

A few days ago, a few of my teachers were poking at my shins and asking me why they are so hard. I didn't understand the question, so I poked them back and sure enough, their shins are really soft. Like there's bone, and then soft flesh. I told them that I have dry skin, yes, but also that my legs are made of muscle from walking everywhere and so often. And biking, as well. They oohed and aahed. This was particularly funny to me, because I am not fit. I am very skinny, yes, but I can develop more strength in my core and glutes. The fact that they literally have no muscle unless they are labor workers puzzle me, because they still do the things normal people do, like carry groceries, wash dishes, clean the floors, etc. How can a person not develop muscle from managing a house daily?

And even their houses are very fashionable. Things are put away, clutter is always discouraged - because they believe that a cluttered desk or room is evidence of the owner's cluttered mind. Interesting connection, right? So you would never find clothes strewn all over a Korean floor.

Since I'm Chinese American, I can fit into most of this clothing, and have been earning enough money, that I can afford to experiment a little bit here and there with everything. For the women, their tops are very loose - nothing like the tight tank tops that Americans sometimes wear. While tight tank tops are sold here, they are considered undershirts or kind of street trashy wear. Revealing cleavage is very much frowned upon. Because Asian women have a different body build, almost all the bras here fit breast sizes AA to B, maybe rarely a C. Oh, and I love Korean panties. I'm not sure what kind of fabric they use, but it's very smooth and deal with sweat and wetness exceedingly well. Part of this must have to do with the great technology and temperate climate they have here. Skinny jeans and short shorts are very common here. The women here have no problem revealing their legs. In the winter, long black panty hose is also favored. There are many styles of socks, including these fuzzy socks that are comfortable and good for winter. There's almost an infinite number of styles for shoes, more than half of them high heels taller than two and a half inches.

Young Korean men sport tight pants as well, though this is no longer true once he enters either the army - military draft is mandatory here - or goes into the work force. Men, as usual, don't have as many fashion choices as women do, but here they seem to have more comfortable athletic pants options, as well as many more styles of sneakers. I've been told that the men's underwear are also very smooth, absorbent and comfortable. There's this booklet at every mall for tips on how to pair the right colors and patterns between collared shirts and ties. They generally pair vests and sweaters with white collared shirts for business wear, and there's the general tshirt and jeans or athletic wear for other days. There are more styles of tshirts or long sleeve shirts than I've seen in America.

Now, Nobody I've seen from other countries can accessorize like a Korean, and I mean that in the most magazine girlish voice possible. For women, there are a good number of hair ornaments, from elastics to head bands, to clips. There's also earrings for those with holes in their earlobes, though holes elsewhere like noses and the tips of one's ears are generally reserved for performers or rebellious youth. There's of course a good number of necklaces and pendants to go with the plainer shirts or dresses. Men sometimes wear earrings and necklaces too. Both genders can wear rings on their fingers, ranging from plastic to karat gold. Styles of belts are many, but if people wear anklets, I have not seen them. There's also color contacts, glasses, the whole routine of makeup, tattoos (rarely) and nail polish. And that's just on their bodies.

Off their bodies, some of the clothing come with accessories, like suspenders, or pockets in various places where even the insides are decorated. Jackets keep them warm in colder weather, and can be worn around the waist, around the shoulders or draped over some furniture showing off. Sometimes there are arm coolers in the summer, made of some fabric that supposedly really does cool you off. There's a really impressive array of styles for purses and bags, which seem to be unisex generally. Everyone from someone who's six years old to the oldest person you see on the subway has a cell phone. On these cell phones and their purses are various charms that you can buy at almost any store in Korea. There are anime or cartoon icons, random fluffy animals, other symbols - almost anything can be found. Koreans match the colors of these charms to their phones and bags. Some phone charms have uses, like my Hello Kitty that has a memory chip inside of it for taking the subway, or a USB, or a stylus/antennae that makes using the phone itself easier.

Everything comes in fairly bright colors for the young, which seem to either go into the extremes of neon or just fade into gray and black as the people wearing them get older. The people here care a lot about their personal sense of style because they're status symbols, and also because they don't really get to express their personalities much in other areas of life.

Ideas on Neatness and Purity

Because of the largely still evident influences from ancient Confucian China, South Korea can be a somewhat traditional society depending on the area of the country you are working in and the number of older Koreans that you have talked to.

In the United States where I'm from, Boston specifically, the standards on neatness and personal cleanliness are more dictated by what is kosher in business. Business casual or more formal is recommended at all times when in the view of one's employees and employers, unless the place you are working for specifically says otherwise or you have a uniform to don every time you go to work.

In South Korea, people are taught from a young age (as young as age five or six), not to have messy hair, or to cover it up with a hat if you do. Stains and lint on one's clothing are marks of bad taste. While no one would say anything about wrinkled shirts, it is not recommended. Many women always wear makeup, especially if they have pimples (which they call "trouble") or birth marks to cover up on their faces. Almost everyone has a fairly developed fashion sense, so one would be hard put to find anyone who wears clothing with clashing colors. This goes for the men as well, though it's true that a certain point after retirement, old women might stop caring nearly as much.

Even the shoes are kept clean. My Korean washing machine has a setting that's just for washing shoes. They make a distinction between outdoor shoes and indoor shoes. While I choose not to abide by it, I'm supposed to wear socks with slippers at work, or these closed toe slippers that is easy to find in any random fashion and school supplies store. My coteacher had told me that it is impolite for people to show bare feet outside of their own homes, but since spring is here and summer is coming, I've been seeing a lot of open toed sandals and even flip flops, so I believe that these social constraints are loosening to the point where they are nonexistent anymore in the cities. Many Korean women also wear heels to boost the appearance of their hind sides, and there are very many styles. While the idea is intriguing to me, I find balance to be an issue.

The convenience stores here also sell men and women's underwear by the pair, as well as tights or dress stockings for women. Therefore, I think it is reasonable to assume that this is for really busy people who might forget to change such things, and that having holes in one's stockings is also not okay by Korean standards.

All of this goes back to the ideas of neatness and purity because this is such a family and couples oriented society. This means that because everyone is supposed to be trying to impress their friends, coworkers and bosses, as well as potential dating partners all the time, looking healthy, alert and clean cut seems to be a social necessity at all times. This may explain why Seoul is one of the fashion capitals of the world, next to Paris and New York.

While I appreciate the aesthetics of this culture, I am not trying too hard to fit into them because I don't think I'm expected to, and it would be impossible for me anyway. I do have the convenience of being able to fit into most of the clothing here provided that it is the right size for me, but the idea of having to put on makeup all the time tires me out. And while I have enough clothes, not re-wearing any outfits throughout the week would just contribute to too much laundry. Oh, and I should mention that this personal neatness standard extends to possessions as well. I am apparently expected to clean a very neat and clean desk as well as apartment at all times. I confess to not living up to these expectations much at all, and I feel chagrin much of the time when I realize I am being judged.

However, I will say that I am very happy with the way they cut hair here. While it's not nearly as detailed as Chinese or Taiwanese styles when it comes to layering, the way they cut bangs is very satisfactory, and no salons in the U.S. except maybe in New York can compare. Since I bought contact lenses for myself, I will also say that the way they quickly examine your eyes at the glasses shops and then let you browse through the brands according to prices are very efficient, as well. While I also haven't been yet, I hear that the spas, massages and other cosmetic treatments here are also very cost effective. Cosmetic surgery is a big industry here, and it's actually very common to get work done. However, I'm too vain to think that I would ever need that.

So personal appearances are very much valued. Another nugget is that if a woman is seen with a man, others will start asking questions immediately about whether they are dating. Therefore, the women here either go on group dates where they are just having fun or looking for a partner, or they don't interact with the men in their lives outside of work at all. The only time a woman here interacts with a man outside of work is perhaps if she is giving a man a chance to pursue her. The men are also very aggressive when pursuing women - he may try to monopolize her attention in any way that he can. People socialize with other people of their own gender all the time, though. That is only among heterosexuals. There is not yet a community or culture of homosexuality here in South Korea yet, and if so, it is very much underground. Cheating on a partner one is married to is against the law here.