Ideas on Neatness and Purity

Because of the largely still evident influences from ancient Confucian China, South Korea can be a somewhat traditional society depending on the area of the country you are working in and the number of older Koreans that you have talked to.

In the United States where I'm from, Boston specifically, the standards on neatness and personal cleanliness are more dictated by what is kosher in business. Business casual or more formal is recommended at all times when in the view of one's employees and employers, unless the place you are working for specifically says otherwise or you have a uniform to don every time you go to work.

In South Korea, people are taught from a young age (as young as age five or six), not to have messy hair, or to cover it up with a hat if you do. Stains and lint on one's clothing are marks of bad taste. While no one would say anything about wrinkled shirts, it is not recommended. Many women always wear makeup, especially if they have pimples (which they call "trouble") or birth marks to cover up on their faces. Almost everyone has a fairly developed fashion sense, so one would be hard put to find anyone who wears clothing with clashing colors. This goes for the men as well, though it's true that a certain point after retirement, old women might stop caring nearly as much.

Even the shoes are kept clean. My Korean washing machine has a setting that's just for washing shoes. They make a distinction between outdoor shoes and indoor shoes. While I choose not to abide by it, I'm supposed to wear socks with slippers at work, or these closed toe slippers that is easy to find in any random fashion and school supplies store. My coteacher had told me that it is impolite for people to show bare feet outside of their own homes, but since spring is here and summer is coming, I've been seeing a lot of open toed sandals and even flip flops, so I believe that these social constraints are loosening to the point where they are nonexistent anymore in the cities. Many Korean women also wear heels to boost the appearance of their hind sides, and there are very many styles. While the idea is intriguing to me, I find balance to be an issue.

The convenience stores here also sell men and women's underwear by the pair, as well as tights or dress stockings for women. Therefore, I think it is reasonable to assume that this is for really busy people who might forget to change such things, and that having holes in one's stockings is also not okay by Korean standards.

All of this goes back to the ideas of neatness and purity because this is such a family and couples oriented society. This means that because everyone is supposed to be trying to impress their friends, coworkers and bosses, as well as potential dating partners all the time, looking healthy, alert and clean cut seems to be a social necessity at all times. This may explain why Seoul is one of the fashion capitals of the world, next to Paris and New York.

While I appreciate the aesthetics of this culture, I am not trying too hard to fit into them because I don't think I'm expected to, and it would be impossible for me anyway. I do have the convenience of being able to fit into most of the clothing here provided that it is the right size for me, but the idea of having to put on makeup all the time tires me out. And while I have enough clothes, not re-wearing any outfits throughout the week would just contribute to too much laundry. Oh, and I should mention that this personal neatness standard extends to possessions as well. I am apparently expected to clean a very neat and clean desk as well as apartment at all times. I confess to not living up to these expectations much at all, and I feel chagrin much of the time when I realize I am being judged.

However, I will say that I am very happy with the way they cut hair here. While it's not nearly as detailed as Chinese or Taiwanese styles when it comes to layering, the way they cut bangs is very satisfactory, and no salons in the U.S. except maybe in New York can compare. Since I bought contact lenses for myself, I will also say that the way they quickly examine your eyes at the glasses shops and then let you browse through the brands according to prices are very efficient, as well. While I also haven't been yet, I hear that the spas, massages and other cosmetic treatments here are also very cost effective. Cosmetic surgery is a big industry here, and it's actually very common to get work done. However, I'm too vain to think that I would ever need that.

So personal appearances are very much valued. Another nugget is that if a woman is seen with a man, others will start asking questions immediately about whether they are dating. Therefore, the women here either go on group dates where they are just having fun or looking for a partner, or they don't interact with the men in their lives outside of work at all. The only time a woman here interacts with a man outside of work is perhaps if she is giving a man a chance to pursue her. The men are also very aggressive when pursuing women - he may try to monopolize her attention in any way that he can. People socialize with other people of their own gender all the time, though. That is only among heterosexuals. There is not yet a community or culture of homosexuality here in South Korea yet, and if so, it is very much underground. Cheating on a partner one is married to is against the law here.