A Wistful Letter

Goodbye, South Korea. You were kind of good to me.

There's too much going on inside you, and when crowds gather, everyone pushes everyone. I'm too short and impatient for that. Being outside of your structure has its benefits and drawbacks. While we are easily forgiven for any social faux pas that we commit, we are also not considered real people. Sometimes, when some people realize we don't speak Korean, we are simply dismissed with a hand wave. The older citizens of this country tend to be very pushy - and while most are well meaning, there are those who are downright condescending - like anywhere else, I suppose. I never enjoyed bowing. I could have, but didn't care about your fashion standards. My luck with jobs in you was also not great; I know some other people had a much better time than I did.

However.

You gave me an honest living for twenty months, and I met many friends here. I had many adventures that I will hold dear to my heart for many decades. Your kids taught me more words in your language than your adults did. I would still enjoy teaching. Isolated from American politics and the Western way of thinking for a while, I realized the effects upon me from where I grew up, who my parents are, and the small actions that I took. Both apartments that you provided me with were very easy to live in, and I felt at home. You gave me a cat. I experienced both rural Korean life and small city Korean culture. Your food was great. Your citizens are unexpectedly helpful at the most surprising moments. Your country is safe. You taught me that in struggles between individual and society, sometimes it's not so bad when society wins.

You taught me to live alone. You taught me to begin to pursue what I want, or even to begin to think about exactly what it is that I want.

Thank you.

These were all the thoughts running through my head as I repacked my luggage in front of the check-in counter to adhere to the "only one" rule, and then went to the ticketing counter to pay an extra $75 for the second luggage. These are the feelings falling from my steps as I went through security, then when the personnel at immigration took my Korean identity card away from me.

If I could hug a whole country and donate my tears, I would. There are surely things that I haven't done and seen yet, and someday, I will come back and pursue them.

For all my friends I met here, you better stay in contact - I am getting a smart phone and downloading Kakao Talk for sure!